Off the top of my head, I can think of ten book titles that irritate the hell out of me and scream "twaddle". Some of the authors also have annoying names – if so, I put the annoying name beside the annoying title. Here goes:
Leaf By Niggle. It niggles.
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius. What a prat.
The Unbearable Lightness of Being. Unbearable.
White Teeth. Zadie Smith. Annoying title, overrated (because black) author, cutesy name.
The Autograph Man. Zadie Smith. As above. The hero is called Alex-Li Tandem. On yer bike!
On Beauty. Zadie Smith. As above. Haven’t read it, but achingly pretentious title.
The Bluest Eye. Toni Morrison. Silly title. Overrated (because black) author. Twee first name.
Saint Maybe. Annoying title, difficult to say properly because the rhythm is wrong. Anne Tyler is a no-nonsense name, so she ought to know better.
A Slipping-down Life. Ditto. Actually, I read this (on recommendation) and it was quite good, but the title nearly put me right off.
The Hobbit. I don’t get this. Is “hobbit” supposed to be a funny word? Is Bilbo Baggins supposed to be a funny name? He should have stayed in his hole.
With some exceptions, the best book titles consist of a name or a place. What more do you need?
More in-depth, scrupulously fair literary criticism next week.
