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Tuesday, 13 May 2008
Things That Stand You In Good Stead
 I've learned a few practical things that have stood me in good stead: 1) when you have a splinter in your finger, soak that finger in a warm saline solution. Osmosis will do the rest. 2) Thirty days hath September, April, June, and November/All the rest have thirty-one/Except February/Which has twenty-eight or sometimes twenty-nine. 3) Even if, or possibly especially if, you do not believe in God, make sure you pray to Him at take-off, at landing, and during times of turbulence. Nothing else has stood the test of time as well as these three rules to live by. If I learn anything as valuable in the future, I'll be sure to let you know. Posted on 6:45 AM by Hugh Fitzgerald
Comments
13 May 2008
reactionry "Is it about the hedge?"*
Or: The Mighty Osmosis Has Spoken
Re 3: Hugh had given us advice on hedge funds and ha-has; now he advises hedging bets. Unless the "Hairy Thunderer"** regards that as "dreadful toadying,"*** it's hard to think of a down side.
Many thanks btw.; much of what little I know of Shakespeare comes from NER by way of osmo- must remember to avoid hackneyed phrases, including "hackney phrases."
*A question asked of Death in Monty Python's The Meaning of Life. And speaking of death by salmon, I should let you all know that I learned yesterday that it is possible to swallow one of those disposable pop-up cooking temperature thingees. While bone, metal and glass are well seen on xray, plastic is not. Fortunately the device in a certain someone's salmon incorporated a metallic spring. I pray that the wisdom bequeathed by the ER staff consulted which sometimes passeth all understanding will hold up under (gag) close inspection, and that this, too, will pass. I should thank the Big Guy; for all I know, Dr. Darrylpimple has had patients who ingest foreign bodies deliberately.
***Ibid
**See NatLamp's Deteriorata 13 May 2008
Mary Jackson 1) Never trust a man who says "discourse". 2) No matter how bad things are, I always feel better after a hot bath or a walk in Waterlow Park. 3) Things always take longer than you think they will. 13 May 2008
reactionry I See London, I see France....
1. Always give credit where credit is due, especially when referencing "Google-thwart"* or "bleg"*
2. See Mary's No. 3. Don't tell the sensor-swallower mentioned in my post above that the object will likely pass in about 3 days; which I did; better to have set low expectations.
3. Take a bath in Waterlow Park; the youth (presumably not a Muslim; a vacationing, "troubled" French "youth" perhaps?) who flashed Mary a few years ago
apparently escaped Scott-free.
4. Ignore my No. 3. I've never set foot in England and there's not a chance in Hell that I'll ever see Londistan or, for that matter, your lovely Ramsbottom.
5. Never hold out much hope for offspring who say, "I'm just droppin' dis course."
*See MJ and an erstwhile NER writer.
13 May 2008
greenmamba **See NatLamp's Deteriorata I didn't need a footnote for that, reactionry; it's everything else........ 13 May 2008
reactionry GM:
Well, that's cast rather a gloom over the thread. Does this help?
13 May 2008
reactionry From the Salmon Bros. Hedge Fund of Bad Verse.....
(hat tip to Will, and for "Monte Carlo or Bust", hats off to Mary, and a tip of the hat to greenmamba and all other engineers)
Bustards For The Busted
For chimney sweeps and engineers,
All of whom must come to dust,
The dim sum of all hopes and fears
Is Monty's "Salmon mousse or bust!" 13 May 2008
 John M. J.
There is only one rule for life that works and it's this - always offer and have available a good cup of tea, for there is nothing in this world that doesn't look better after a good cup of tea. I can face anything after a dish of bohea! 14 May 2008
greenmamba Does this help? That'll do nicely, Sir. (No link but it's Pamela Stephenson after being offered an American Express card as she unbuttons ....) We are all Americans now and explain our jokes. 14 May 2008
reactionry Why walk all over foreigners when you can ride? (except by ship or rail, I guess)
Thanks for the clues to the link.
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